Ya really otta be thankful for having the T&G to quench your thirst for dirt. The T&G is abhorrent you say? Nobody reads it. Aw cut it out people. You know it's the first place you go for dirt everyday. You expect dirt from the T&G. In fact you demand it. What would you're life be without it?
What about WOMAG, ain't they got dirt on folks? Actually they'd rather entertain you with profiles of people and places. Fact is, if you read one story, you read em all, cause nuttin really changes in Wusta. The friendly staff @ WOMAG knows that and they’re furiously milking the archives for ideas to put a new fresh spin. Good luck guys. Ya know, thankfully the new owners dumped most of those deluded counterculture fools who thought they were journalists. Imagine what you’d be reading today? I shudder to think.
Hey, I wonder where they're are now? That's a story eh Jeremy? Any idea what ole Lester Dubya Paquin is up to? Living in Barre last I heard. Chet Williamson's been playing The Sears Afternoon Concerts at the Auburn Mall. The rest? Their ashes scattered in the wind?
Hey I got an idea, how about getting all the hundreds of former employees together for a big hoedown at the Hanover singing Kumbyya - release it on video and MP3, sell it online, get some local airplay, interviews with Jordan Levy. Promote the shit outta it - t-shirts, lighters, key-chains, and books.
I’m wondering why WOMAG never let it cherished patrons discuss their stories on line? Yeah I know the software is mono-functional - they weren't thinking ahead were they. But isn't that typical of WOMAG over the years, so I've been told. Sticking to an outdated business model, regurgitate the same themes ad infinitum. Think they’ll change that anytime soon? Wouldn’t you just love to give your two cents to those one-sided uncritical repetitive banal clichéd monotonal political propaganda and human interest pieces? I would.
Ask yourself, what exactly has your favorite local blog contributed to your knowledge base that isn’t regurgitated T&G news? Are you being entertained? Are you spiritually fulfilled? Hey fagit I asked. I know those are tough questions that you’d rather not deal with right now. Weekend’s almost here. So on that note.
Well it seems the rest of America is having a grand ole time while we wallow in boredom. When I'm wallowing in the dreaded Wusta doldrums, I head over to The Obscure Store & Reading Room for a fix of pure unadulterated and prurient news on Americans being Americans. Does the trick.
